motivation

I've been trying to lose weight ever since Josh got to be about 5 months old.  As always, it's been a rollercoaster ride full of ups and downs, but ever since the beginning of June I've done pretty well to stay on track.  I've lost 11 pounds since June 7th and I think that's pretty good.  Slow and steady wins the race.  I'd like to lose a lot more but I'm just trying to make small changes, changes that I can make a permanent part of my life.

One of my goals is to exercise some small bit every single day.  This really isn't as hard as I thought it would be.  I'm such a schedule/routine person that I used to try very hard to schedule in my exercise and do it on a regular basis at the same time each day.  I've finally figured out that this just isn't very feasible.  With two kids I have to be more flexible and just exercise whenever I get the spare fifteen minutes.

That means that if we have nothing going on one morning then I occupy the kids and try to go run before I take my shower.  If we have a busy morning of running around then I try to go right after dinner and ride my bike pulling the kids in the trailer or pushing the kids in the stroller as I walk the neighborhood.  Occasionally, we'll have a busy day full of running all morning and then all evening as well and then I'll have to try to squeeze in some exercise after both kids are in bed.  This is the hardest.  Mostly it's hard because I'm not a night person.  I am completely exhausted by the end of the day lately and I want nothing more than to sit on the couch after Jules and Josh are in bed.  Sometimes that's what happens.  Still.  I'm trying.

A few years ago when I turned 29, I set a goal of completing at least one organized race each year until I turn 40.  I don't think that's too hard to do and I don't think it is unrealistic.  As a matter of fact, I look forward to participating in various races with my kids as they get older. We're trying to convince Julianna to do her first race with us on July 31st as we run the Mission Mile.  It's only a one mile race and I know she could do it.  Right now all she says she'll do is cheer though.  I think she thinks she'll get a cheerleader uniform and pompoms if she insists on standing on the sidelines.  Wrong.

This year I finally feel ready to take on a big one.  I actually signed up for the Ramblin' Rose triathlon in August and while I may have simply lost my mind, at this point I am still excited about it.  I will have to swim 250 yards, bike 9 miles, and then run 2 miles.  I'm to the point now where I can run 2 miles pretty easily again.  I'm riding my bike regularly (but I don't know about 9 miles!) and honestly, the swimming part scares me to death.  I will probably just bob along in the pool, walking when I can and I don't care.  I will still be proud of myself, as long as I finish.  Please pray for me as I get ready for the race.

A couple of times lately someone very close to me has said some hurtful things about my appearance and oddly enough, once I got over the hurt of it all, the comments have only served to motivate me.  I think because it was someone who's opinion I value so much that has made it all that much more important to do what I can to get to my goal weight and at least do what I can to change how I look and how I feel about myself. Usually, things like that do NOT motivate me, they only depress me.  Usually, I am motivated by other things like fitting into a pair of favorite jeans, etc.

Also, I saw this picture the other day and I immediately remembered that I HATED my appearance in this photo.  I am actually surprised that I was even comfortable enough to wear a bikini.  I despised my fat thighs and I remember that when it was taken I was dieting then as well.  I wanted to lose about 15 pounds.  Sadly, I would LOVE to look that way now.  I can't remember the last time I wore a bikini.  Apparently, it was before either of my kids were born.  This picture was taken during the summer of 2004.  I hope to be comfortable in a bathing suit again by the summer of 2011.  With only about 28 pounds to go I think I can do that.

In contrast to the picture above, here is it's equivalent today.  This picture is horrendous.  It makes me cringe every time I look at it.  It was taken this past April and I cannot even believe I am posting it.  Anyway, the spare tire I have hanging over my maternity jean capris repulses me.  I hope that this picture will serve as inspiration for me to love my body again and be proud of what it can do and has done for me.

I shared this quote on Facebook not too long ago, but it still rings true with meaning to me these days so I thought I'd post it here to remember.


"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." - Aristotle


What motivates you?  Can you offer any words of motivation to keep me going?  I could use it.