Saturday, December 30, 2006

Happy New Year!

Okay my little blogging hiatus is officially over. I had to take a break for lots of reasons, most of which you don't want to hear so I won't bore you. Just know I'm back. I've got TONS of adorable new pictures and videos to show you. Hope you enjoy!

Julianna has changed a bunch since I last posted. She's learned to crawl and is almost walking. She's taken a few steps and ventures out on her own pretty often now. There's never a dull moment with her these days. She even stands up in her crib and plays for a while before she decides to finally take a nap.

Work has been good, but a little hectic. It's been very nice to have a couple of weeks off for the holidays. I moved classrooms at school so I spent a lot of time the last week at school trying to get organized and adjusted in my new environment. The new room is a lot nicer though so it's been exciting. Anyway, I've had a HUGE project for work that I've been having to work on over Christmas break which is no fun, but at least I've been getting it done while big J babysits. It's good for him to have alone time with the little girl too.

Yesterday, mom and dad actually kept little J so that we could go to the movies and to lunch which was SO NICE. We even got to take a nap on the couch! It was awesome!

Well, I can't write much more without starting to ramble so I'll quit while I'm ahead (or at least while I think I am). More on Monday...

Lots of Videos



















































































































Monday, November 20, 2006

ponderings from the queen of the snot house

i had a great weekend this past weekend and it’s not too bad that it’s Monday since i only have two more days ‘til we head to the beach. i think my mom and dad are going to take the little girl on down to the beach with them tomorrow since i’ll have to stay back and work which will be a little scary (but i have to admit exciting too) being without her on a four hour trip to the beach. we’ve taken two or three 4-hour car trips with her since she’s been born and she’s done great in the past. i am interested to see though how that will change now that she stays awake for much longer periods of time. i hope it won’t be too bad for Nanna and Papaw!

well, i'm not feeling too well and the little girl is still congested from whatever started as a result of her flu shot. neither one of us is sleeping very soundly because of it. i think for little J it’s just really hard for to breathe at night (although that’s not stopping her from wanting to walk all over the place during the day with snot dripping along her path…)

she is becoming more and more mobile. she has been working on her army crawl over the past couple of days as well as still trying to learn to regular-crawl. of course, she really prefers to be up walking by holding our hands, but she can go really fast now holding on with just one hand and she is making progress with the crawling. i dread it, but i also encourage her to learn.

anyway, we saw some good friends of ours briefly this past weekend which was nice. they were in town from Florida and i think we’re going to try to plan a beach trip with them sometime in the next couple of months so that the little girls can play together.

oh and i need to tell you Oh Friends of the Internet that i finally set another weight-loss/exercise goal. (if i don’t put it out there, i’ll never do it.) i am going to start running/dieting again whenever my sister-in-law has her baby. she’s due at the end of December, but of course can go into labor any time now and i just needed to pick a date to start so that’s what i came up with. plus maybe if she's trying to lose weight then too, maybe she will provide some inspiration. if it’s not after Christmas well then… oh well then… i’ll at least start exercising and then work on the diet more after the new year.


so anyway, that’s all i’ve got today. sorry to bore you.

Friday, November 17, 2006

time keeps on ticking... ticking...

i have so much free time now that i’m done with my online class, i cannot stand it. [there was a lot of sarcasm in that statement, in case you didn’t know.] i took little J to get her first dose of flu shot on Tuesday morning and by that evening she was running a fever and she didn’t sleep well at all that night. to top it off, the next morning the cat came in looking like this:



the picture doesn't do it justice. he had a softball size lump sticking out of the side of his face. it was a busy day Wednesday with a staff meeting that i volunteered to lead half of and a sick cat and baby to tend to; plus i was going on very little sleep since Jules kept us up a lot of the night. by last night i had called the doctor about little J’s fever and since they told me to take her temperature rectally i had to rush home and figure out how to do that. nope, never done it before, but knew i’d have to figure it out sooner or later. i knew that a low grade fever after the shot was normal but i didn’t know what constituted a low grade fever.

anyway, her temperature was 102 degrees and she was getting pretty congested so i called and the after hours nurse told me that we had been giving her the wrong dose of children’s Tylenol. we’d been giving her 0.4 ml and were supposed to be giving 1.2 ml! who knew?! why don’t they print that mess on the bottle instead of just saying “For children under 24 pounds contact a physician”?! so we finally got the right amount of medicine in her and she started to feel a little better you could tell. she slept better last night even though she still cried out every hour or so.

so about the cat - i called the vet this morning and had to take him in as soon as possible. the vet put him on antibiotics and told us to give it 24 hours. if the swelling doesn’t go down by the morning we’ll have to take him in first thing and get him anesthetized and the wound lacerated (wow! that sounds fun) so nothing else gets infected. by the way, the vet said it was obviously from another cat’s bite. so yeah. lots of free time since i turned in my final exam. i'm so glad tomorrow is Friday.

i’ve gotten the suitcases out to start packing for the beach, but nothing has made it in them. only three more days of work. yippee!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

the holiday season has begun

yesterday Julianna got the first dose of the flu shot. she was fine all afternoon, but she was awake most of the night last night. when she wasn't tossing and turning she was crying out in her sleep. i stayed in her room and watched her some and it was so pitiful. she was obviously not feeling well. she started running a low fever and i have been giving her Tylenol, but her nose is running this morning and her eyes are watering too. i am going to keep an eye on her and if she's not better tomorrow then i will make a doctor's appointment. :( it's so sad to have a baby that doesn't feel well. i hope she doesn't get sick any other time this winter. besides this episode she hasn't ever really been sick her whole life.

on a happier note, we had Thanksgiving with part of the family on Saturday. we got some cute pictures of little J on the tractors at big J's grandmother's house and of course we had good food. we are going to the beach with the other part of the family next week so i'm sure we'll get some more cute Thanksgiving pictures and more good food. it's nice to stretch it out instead of rushing from house to house. plus we get to spread out eating the yummy food instead of cramming it in all in one day like some families do. we don't usually have Thanksgiving together with my family so i am excited about being at the beach longer with them too instead of the usual 3 days. so now the countdown is on. only 6 more days! the holiday season has officically begun! maybe i'll start playing some Christmas music!

Monday, November 13, 2006

i'm back

well i haven’t been around the last two weeks because i’ve been trying to spend the time i would usually be blogging on the work for my online class. the plan didn’t work as well as i thought it would because i still didn’t put a whole lot of time into the class, but at least i got it finished. i turned in my final exam on Friday and i got an 86% on it. not too terribly bad for someone who only took about 30 minutes on it. anyway, the class was fun and i learned a lot so i’m glad i did it, but i also now know that it’s a lot to handle during the school year. i didn't expect it to but it caused me major unnecessary stress (because of all of the deadlines) even though it was a class i was taking just for fun.

SO

i promised cute baby pictures and here they are.


Jules has been trying to learn to crawl…















and she's figuring out how to use the computer...















she's also already been having fun playing dress up...
















her daddy still puts her to bed every night...





















and she's had a lot of fun playing in the leaves!

Thursday, November 2, 2006

i promise i haven't died

i'm sorry i have disappeared for a few days. i told myself that i wouldn't blog until i'd caught up with the work for my online class. i am almost there. it has been hard, but i only have two more lessons and then the final exam. i'll be back soon.

and oohhhhhh i've got some cute baby pictures to show you! :)

Thursday, October 26, 2006

on my mind

my husband and i have gradually stopped turning on the TV so much lately and started setting aside “reading time” every night after the little girl goes to bed. this has definitely helped with my stress level although it is still really hard to get used to accomplishing things in little chunks of time instead of in one big chunk. anyway, at least i do feel like i am getting some things done, but it is frustrating to not have that time to myself to do whatever i want. still i’ll take the less-stress path any day. life changes so much when you have a baby and i guess i am still getting used to it.

this weekend is going to be a crazy one. we have a parent conference day all day tomorrow and i am dropping my car off to get brakes worked on before work. we have to go to a surprise birthday party for my uncle on Saturday night. Saturday morning some co-workers and i are taking some time out at Dream Dinners and Sunday my family is going on their first 5th Sunday Hike after church. i also have to fix brunch for the Sunday School class (don’t have a clue what i’m doing there and i haven’t had a chance to go to the store but i’ll figure it out sometime). hope you all have a great weekend!

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

month seven

Dear Julianna,

You are already seven months old! You are changing daily so it seems like time is going by so fast. You have three more new teeth now (all on top) and you are making progress with your walking. You are also finally showing a few signs of interest in crawling although last month we would have sworn that you would never want to crawl. We thought you would go straight to walking since you beg to be UP so much. You consistently reach for our hands and lift your arms in the air as if you are begging to be picked up or “walked.” You tug on our sleeves when you are sitting next to us until we hold your hands for you to pull up. You have amused us on the rocking horses this month and you’re all over the house in your walker. You amaze me in how much stronger you get every day. You are learning to communicate more and more and you are making it easier for us to give you what you want. Wow! Time goes by so fast!

You are still sleeping great – almost 11 hours at night and 3 hours during the day. You have cut back to only two naps a day now which makes things a little more difficult for your mommy but it’s OK because I get to see you more and we can go out for longer periods of time now. No more dashes to the grocery store in the blink of an eye. Now we can take a little more time and you have especially learned to love riding in the front of the cart and watching everything that goes on. You lean your head waaayyy back to see everyone that goes by. Just like your mama, you love to watch people.

We actually took you to the fair this month which was pretty uneventful, but a first for you. You got to take in all the sights and smells; mostly you just watched everyone.

You say, “bbbbaaaaaa, baaaaa, baaaa” all the time and “mmmmmmm, mmmmmmm, maaaaa, maaa, maaaaa” too. You *almost* know who mama is (and dada too), but kitty is one word you know for sure! You love to pet Simon and try to eat his feet sometimes. You smile every time you see him.

You also still have quite a bit of fun in the bath each night. You’re learning to drink the water and roll and laugh and play.

You are still gaining weight too! You’re almost up to 22 pounds now and you’re wearing 12+ month clothes now. You still look a lot like your daddy, but I think you have a lot of my personality (both good and bad). There’s no question that you are ours.

You’ll have to get a flu shot soon, but of course I know you’ll take it like a champ. You always do. You only whimper a tiny bit and then are easily distracted.

We did have a few firsts this month. One morning I walked in the kitchen to get a washcloth to wipe your mouth and I left you on the couch. I learned a hard lesson when I heard a thump from the other room and then I heard you crying. I was crying long after your tears were gone, but you were OK – just scared. I felt such an enormous amount of guilt after that, but I know it won’t be the first time either.

We also saw the first signs of “stranger anxiety” in you when you cried at other people holding you recently. Selfishly, it makes me feel so warm and well… loved, but it also makes me wish that you wouldn’t hurt other people’s feeling either. It makes me so sad sometimes when I think about how independent you’ve become and how you don’t want to just sit (how boring!) in my lap anymore. I know it won’t be long before you don’t want much to do with me at all and you’ll be all over the place so I am cherishing this time with you. Julianna, I love you. Love, Mama


Tuesday, October 24, 2006

what a difference a day makes

a is for beautiful

someone asked me yesterday how i got the name for my blog. i knew i would be asked this at some point and i contemplated whether or not i would share the story. really my mom or my dad could tell the story better. it’s a simple story about my grandmother – my mom’s mom and a sweet woman who suffered from the debilitating disease Michael J. Fox also has (Parkinson’s Disease).

anyway, basically she was reading an alphabet book to my cousin (the first grandchild on that side of the family) where it listed one word on each page for every letter of the alphabet. well, when she was reading she somehow read, “A is for beautiful” instead of what the first page actually said and everyone had a good laugh.

since i wasn’t there at the time i obviously don’t remember this happening, but i have heard the story told many times over by my mom and dad as well as by my aunt and uncle. my grandmother died many years ago, but when i started my official blog (the first blog was published on my own no-longer active site www.courtneytucker.org) it was the most natural name i could think of. i knew that i would be writing mostly about my adventures in parenthood and it seemed a worthy name and a good tribute to my grandma. so that’s my story and i’m sticking to it. what phrases make you think of one of your relatives?

Friday, October 20, 2006

today in numbers

bottles washed: 14
loads of laundry folded: 3
diapers changed: 2
amount of time until my parent conference: 2 hours 10 minutes
pieces of Halloween candy that i've eaten today (it's 9:52 am people!): 8
hours until my weekend begins: 5

this week in pictures

"Where did Nanna go?"

"Hey Nanna! Did you know that this chair rocks?!"

"My teeth hurt! Why are you making me smile at that dumb camera?!"

"Papaw bought me a new toy!"

Someone got a new car.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

to have and to hold from that day forward

we don’t usually give gifts for our anniversary or for birthdays really. we typically just buy what we want whenever we want it. we are lucky.

it takes a lot of pressure off of us for special occasions and then we usually just get to spend time with each other (which to me is the best gift anyway). today is our four year anniversary. last night we got to spend special time together to celebrate the last four blissful years of marriage. it was a nice quiet evening with just the two of us.

anyway, i feel like i’ve learned a lot over the last few years. i’ve obviously learned that marriage isn’t easy and that it takes a lot of work. you need more than just love for each other. when we don’t work really hard at our marriage things can get rough, but we are both committed to it so we always go back to working hard at it and then it is good.



over the last four years i’ve also learned that marriage can be just as rewarding as i always thought it would be. you have someone to go through life with. someone to share the happiness and the sorrow. someone to help carry your burdens and who loves you even when they don't have to.

so Booger, thank you for the last four years. thank you for working with me to make our marriage work. thank you for being my CTO, my best friend, my partner in crime, and my sounding board. thanks for laughing at my stupid jokes and listening endlessly to my stories and complaints. thank you for my little girl, for helping me create a perfect family, for making me happy, and for your committment. i’ll love you always, CCC

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

the end of the grading period

so so frustrated. i got a call from our principal this morning. she had received a call from a parent wanting to have a conference with me, the principal, and another parent ASAP. this makes me SO stressed. i hate conferences with parents [what teacher doesn’t?] and because i teach at a private school requests for conferences seem to pop up a lot – certainly around report card time.

sometimes i think of how easy it would be to just give the students the grades they want (and the grades their parents want them to get) to avoid the hassle of having to meet with them later. i know some teachers who do this. but i've noticed that i especially want to just give “easy A” grades now that i have a baby and have different priorities in life and many more uses for my time. i really don’t want to be meeting with parents arguing over dumb project grades. i want to be home playing peek-a-boo and yes, even chaging smelly diapers.

but the teacher in me – the one who wants to do what is right for the students and the one who wants to actually TEACH – says that i have to give the grade that was earned and not take the easy way out just to avoid a conference.

but UGH! does anyone want to go argue my case for me? the conference is Friday at noon.

Monday, October 16, 2006

three things

i learned (relearned) three important things this weekend.

this weekend i relearned that you can get an awful lot done when you try. i had to make up for the last two weeks of getting virtually nothing done or i was going to go crazy and poke my own eyes out or something. so i worked a lot (especially on Saturday). i watched zero TV and exercised not at all. i ate a lot, spent time with my husband a lot, and got my haircut. mostly, i just tried to get un-stressed and accomplish a lot of school stuff. with my husband’s help i think i was mostly successful. although i am not completely caught up with my work stuff, it sure feels good to be close.

we kept the three year olds in Sunday School yesterday. there i learned that my daughter will one day be three and therefore she will one day be sticky, icky, ooey, gooey gross. she will have play dough squished permanently underneath her fingernails. she will have snot running down her face. she will learn to pull up her dress and show her fanny to the world. she will love to sit in my lap and not sit in my lap, immediately squirming her way down again. she will love attention more than she does now. she will be able to vanish in the blink of an eye. she will want one! of everything i touch. she will make “pace ships” and she will sing while she pees even if she has to make up the words. she will love, love, love to play in the water while she “washes” her hands. she will be a three year old who makes me want to wash my hands all the time and will not be afraid to tell me when she’s “already had snack!” but she will also need my attention and love.

however, she will be potty trained.

this weekend i also learned that my sister can’t live with us forever. i know it is kinda weird to some people that she lives with us, but i am glad and it works for all of us so i don’t care. (and why should it matter anyway when we have the extra space and she needs a place to live?)

it makes me sad that she is looking for houses. she is so helpful when she is there. she helps bathe the little girl and cook dinners and grocery shop. occasionally she mows the grass and helps me clean. lots of times she watches fun TV and goofs off making cards with me, but mostly she is just there for us. she is going to baby-sit for us Wednesday night so that we can go out for our anniversary. YAY!

she listens to me gripe about J. she makes me laugh with her crazy antics and morning hairstyles. she encourages me to be healthy and counsels me about whatever junk is going on. she even keeps me up-to-date on the latest gossip.

yesterday, she came in after going to an open house and she was all excited about it. it made me realize that she probably will be moving out soon and while i am happy for her getting what she wants and needs i am also heartbroken that my little sis is leaving me. WAH!

i am glad that she is looking for houses somewhat close to home because i’m thinking about moving in with her. at least during Kaizen week.


three relatively ordinary things, but three important-to-me things nonetheless.

Friday, October 13, 2006

she's going to be a talker


she wouldn't shut up long enough for me to take a picture of her with her mouth closed! (thanks Karen/Connie for the cute outfit!)

Thursday, October 12, 2006

hooray for the nap fairy!

praise God and all of the angels! just when i was weary beyond weary. just when i was on the verge of tears AGAIN. just when i was beginning to need it the most, little J slept a full hour and a half for her morning nap today so i have been working my fanny off. although i haven’t made a dent in The List, i have gotten a lot done and i feel a ton of relief. maybe i won’t feel like crying when i get home this evening. now back to work.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

tears and such

there’s not a day that goes by where the girl doesn’t amaze me. yesterday i was so overwhelmed with stuff to do that i sat down and had a little cry. i realized (when the little girl started staring at me with a very quizzical look on her face) that she has never seen me cry. she’s never seen anyone cry for that matter (not that there haven’t been tears since she was born - certainlt not that - it's just that none were in front of her).

anyway, i couldn’t help but stop crying and smile at her when she was looking at me. somehow she always makes me happy. so i had to hug her and tell her that everything was OK. i really wasn’t able to get much done yesterday at all. it’s like the sun magically comes up and sets before i even know it. it's harder now to get stuff done than when little J was a baby. i think that's just because my list is longer now than it was when all ihad to do was stay home and take care of her.


well, at least the 7th graders are gone to the zoo today which *might* actually mean that i may get one extra thing done that’s on my list, but it’s still highly unlikely the way things are going. and Monday is a teacher work day but heaven forbid i should count on having any time then to actually do work. on a workday. oh my! we don't do that.

i’m just so tired of people manipulating my time. one of the things on my list of 100 things to do before i die is to learn to say no to people respectfully. i just don’t know that i’ll ever get there. BIG sigh.

I’m sorry I don’t have any energy to put up new pictures today. You’ll just have to wait until this weekend. For now, here’s a message brought to you by jules:

“baaaa, baaa, baaaaaaa!”

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

happenings

the little girl cut her third tooth this morning. this one's on the top. she seems to be OK and not really effected by it. so far.

on a whim last night we decided to move the Tues./Thurs. morning exercising to evenings because the husband has to get up at least an hour earlier this week and because it's darker outside in the mornings now. and since the little girl goes to bath/bed at 7:45 and our treadmill is right next to her bedroom we know that we have to do it before that. i actually already ran this morning. yay me!

also, the dumb local cbs people decided to change the time of one of my favorite shows without telling me about it. (i'm sure they advertised it, but i didn't see it so that doesn't count.) anyway, i'm ticked 'cause i missed How I Met Your Mother last night.

i'm stressed. and i'm no fun to be around lately and i certainly have nothing worthwhile to write or even the energy to put anything into this blog right now, so until later....

Monday, October 9, 2006

i've been tagged

PCOS baby tagged me and since I didn't post earlier today I decided to do this really quickly tonight.

System – This makes me immediately think of some of my kids who try to buck the system. They are constantly being mischievous and sneaky. When I walked in to work today I heard about an incident that happened in my classroom earlier this morning. The newspaper class was using the computer lab while it was available and while the teacher walked out of the room to use the bathroom for 2 or 3 minutes one of the kids changed all of the Internet Explorer icons to say F--- YOU. I teach at a Christian school mind you. Anyway, the teacher saw it of course, and the child faces expulsion (because this incident was of course, added to a long list of his other discipline infractions).

Coffee – Hmmmmm. Easy one. I’m on a diet in case you didn’t already know. Well, last night we didn’t have anything for dinner and didn’t feel like going anywhere either. I haven’t been to the grocery store in at least two weeks. We had some leftover breadsticks from Olive Garden and so for dinner I had breadsticks and light coffee ice cream. Mmmmmm so good and SO not on my diet. And I conveniently forgot to photograph them.

Cloud – Cloud makes me think of the online computer class that I am taking. It is a beginning graphics design course on Photoshop 7 and we are currently learning about all of the different brushes. One of the brushes we used in the last lesson I did was perfect for drawing clouds. Which is all I knew to do with it.

Harmony – For reasons that I would really not like to go into, harmony reminds me of a person that I’m not really fond of. (You can use your imaginations, but you still probably wouldn’t guess the person.) This person never goes away and can be really annoying. Sometimes I wonder how he/she got to where he/she is now, but I do feel like sometimes there’s more there that I don’t know all about so I’m not going to judge *too* harshly. I just occasionally wish the he/she were not always just there.

Saturday, October 7, 2006

is it Monday yet?

i’m all alone. :) the husband went to the beach with some friends, the sister went to sunny Miami for the weekend for a bachlorette party. it’s just me and the little girl. i have a list of things to do a mile long but i know that without anyone to help with little J it’s going to be hard to get any of it done. oh well.

i’m taking an online computer class that i signed up for just for kicks. well, as it turns out it’s kicking my tail. i can’t keep up and the material is harder than i originally thought. i mean, a beginning computer class for a computer teacher, easy right?! nah. it’s not that it’s hard, it’s just a lot to do every week. so I am spending my Saturday sitting here working on school work (and using this blog entry to procrastinate a tad). not to mention the pile of school work i have for the job that actually pays me...

it’s one of the first weekends in a long time where i’m sorta kinda actually looking forward to Monday.

Friday, October 6, 2006

baby babble

jules has been expanding her "vocabulary" lately. here is a video of some of her babble. of course, i'm partial, but it's soooo cute.



punkin' patch


My creation
Originally uploaded by c525600.
yesterday morning we took little J to the pumpkin patch at Nanna and Papaw’s church. as might be expected, she was much more interested in the cars going by and the other kids outside than she was in the pumpkins, but we did get some adorable pictures nevertheless. so oooohhh and aaaahhhh at my cute baby…

Thursday, October 5, 2006

the cat entertains

manipulates us with her pitiful crying antics

on my mind

in recent years my immediate family has exchanged extravagant gifts for Christmas, drawn names and given just one gift, played “Dirty Santa”, and just not given gifts, etc, etc. this year we are talking about not giving gifts, but adopting a needy family instead. i know that we will probably also do this in our churches and other organizations as well, but my family just simply does not need any more STUFF. we give and get plenty with the other families we’re a part of and sometimes it seems kind of ridiculous to spend so much money on unnecessary STUFF that we sometimes don’t even care for.

so who to “adopt”? my sister is an elementary school counselor and she has access to plenty of children who would not only love some extra Christmas presents but probably won’t get many. my parents also volunteer at Open Arms Community Center and know several kids who will get little and they could use some extra love.

plus that takes a wee bit of pressure off the shopping requirements because it’s easy to buy for someone who will appreciate anything they get.

by the way…

i am totally participating in this.

maybe it will hold me a little more accountable. i know it’s going to be hard to do and i’m going to whine and stress out that i forgot to take a picture of something before i ate it, but i’m going to try hard not to cheat. that should at least make me think about what i'm eating.


so far this morning i have captured my bowl of Cheerios on camera. i know it’s only 10 am, but i also wanted to snack already (how sad) and all i had to do was think about getting out the camera again to decide i didn’t need anything else. plus how embarrassing would it be to show the world that i ate Baked Lays before noon? thank you, Zoot for the good idea.

also, the little girl has learned to fake cry. it is so hilarious. her verbal/language development has skyrocketed in the last couple of weeks so she's making all kinds of new (and funny) sounds. when she's sitting somewhere and we're not paying attention to her and she wants to get up and "walk" she starts this fake cry sound. it's not her usual fuss. it's more like real cry sounds, but you can look at her and tell that she's putting on. she's learning to manipulate us. my little girl is growing up!

what is the funniest is when we can get her to half smile in the middle of it. i'll try to get a video to post.

and finally, as i mentioned before, my ten year high school reunion is next weekend. they emailed out this picture last night with a message encouraging everyone to buy tickets. too funny! the picture is a little small, but can you find me?

Tuesday, October 3, 2006

major mommy guilt

i just can’t get it together lately. i mean, how do you forget to feed your baby?! if that’s not a sign of my pending dementia then i don’t know what is. (story to come, but first i must complain a little.)

i’m just so tired and i’m behind in everything. i can’t get up on time. i get home in the evenings and time goes by before i even know it and i haven’t gotten anything done. i didn’t even go exercise this morning because i couldn’t get up. i don’t know what the deal is but i seem to be in a funk. i think a lot of it has to do with the daylight times changing SO FAST and the weather getting cooler. i hate winter. WAH. wah. WAH.

so now you wanna know how i forgot to feed my child. well then. i’ll tell you.

on Monday’s the husband goes to play basketball with some guys from work. yesterday in particular was a crazy day for me with so much going on because i didn’t get anything done from the weekend. it was a Monday where i seemed to forget everything. the little girl is transitioning from three naps a day to two so instead of us getting home and me putting her down for nap # 3 like usual yesterday i brought her in and we played for a while. i was checking my email and doing some other stuff with her next to me on the couch and the sister and i randomly decided to go up to the elementary school where big J was playing ball. we loaded the little girl into the stroller and walked around for a while. J had a lot of fun looking at the playground, cheerleaders, and little league players and she wasn’t fussing at all. we later came home to make dinner and that was when i realized that i had forgotten to give little J her bottle nearly two hours earlier when she would normally wake up.

i knew that i couldn’t just give her the bottle then because she would get her last bottle of the day right before bed which was in an hour. i also knew that i couldn’t give her a portion of a bottle because she would have nothing of that and i sure didn’t want to hear an hour’s worth of screaming. so since she seemed to be OK i gave her a half a jar of sweet potatoes and she was fine. she took her bath, bottle and went to sleep an hour later as usual. thank God for easy babies.

lately she’s been adding more and more solid food so she will drop a bottle in a couple of months but according to the doctor she’s still supposed to be getting all five for now. she did fine after that last night so she must be getting enough to eat, but talk about guilt! man, i was so hard on myself! I. Cannot. Believe. I. Forgot. To. Feed. The. Baby.

(also, let me just say that this would NOT have happened five months ago so i must be calming down with my obsessiveness type A just a wee little bit, right?)


OK let the jokes begin.

quite the green thumb


my husband's african violet

Monday, October 2, 2006

recent developments

how oh how are you supposed to lose weight when Cold Stone offers free ice cream for Make a Wish Foundation, Maggie Moo’s starts selling ice cream cupcakes (seriously. have you ever heard of an ice cream cupcake?), work provides Panera breakfast leftovers from the Grandparent’s Day celebration, you donate blood and they give you free Dunkin’ Donuts (disappointing that they weren’t KKs), the girl’s soccer team sells cakes at a bake sell, and the evening school function (that is required of all staff) gives free Chick-fil-a and cake walks, and last but not least the fair is in town?

i had gotten down to within seven pounds of my pre-preg weight and then i fell off the wagon AGAIN. at least i have still been exercising, but i avoided the scale this morning.

and in other random news, apparently we are an “enriched environment” family because Friday when i was in the teacher work room making copies a teacher before me had left one of their study guides, obviously for an anatomy test or something like that, on the copy machine. anyway, at the top it said, “Most infants develop motor abilities in the same order and at approximately the same age. In this sense, most agree that these abilities are genetically programmed within all infants. The environment does play a role in the development, with an enriched environment often reducing the learning time and an impoverished one doing the opposite.” and then it listed a bunch of developmental milestones by month. well, little J has so far met all of the milestones way early except for the rolling one. she is 6 months and can pretty much do all the way up to the 10 months milestones. we are blessed to be able to give her an “enriched environment” for learning and developing!


2 months - able to lift head up on his own
3 months - can roll over
4 months - can sit propped up without falling over
6 months - is able to sit up without support
7 months - begins to stand while holding on to things for support
9 months - can begin to walk, still using support
10 months - is able to momentarily stand on her own without support
11 months - can stand alone with more confidence
12 months - begin walking alone without support
14 months - can walk backward without support
17 months - can walk up steps with little or no support
18 months - able to manipulate objects with feet wile walking, such as kicking a ball

Saturday, September 30, 2006

sniff. sniff.

if you haven't seen this yet then go there. now.

sniff. sniff. sniff.

oh and by the way. i have been given permission to shop. yes. i know. how incredible it is! and even despite my recent post about cutting back. we were outside last night at this school function thingy and J kept covering jules up with a blanket because, in his defense, it was cold. anyway, the girl grows like a weed so i had her in the warmest cute outfit we could find (that she could fit her chubby thighs into) and he was still very worried about her. he said, "do we need to stop at Babies 'R Us on the way home?"

score!

Friday, September 29, 2006

vent

i used to love gift cards. the tightwad in me just loved getting “free” things at places i regularly visited. plus, they’re one of the more useful gifts that teachers actually get. however, i have recently had a few bad experiences with the stack of gift cards (and I do mean stack – at least 20) that i’ve acquired over the past 12 months or so. so now i'm starting to like them not so much.

first let me say that i am obsessive about keeping track of how much money there is left on a gift card that i haven’t fully used. not only do i write the new amount on the back of the card in black Sharpee, but i also usually wrap the receipt around the card itself that tells the remaining balance on the card. then i put the card back in my stack and put a rubber band around them all.

so why is it that it never fails that the computers tell you that you have some random amount left on the card the next time you visit that business? the other night we went to a chain restaurant and i pulled out my gift cards to pay. i had two, one with the original $10 on it and the other with a remaining balance of $15.30 according to my notes. well, the waiter came back and told me that there was only $9 left on the second card which i really don’t understand. i know that $6.30 is not really that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things, but it just makes me mad that someone had already paid that restaurant when the gift was originally purchased and now they’ve gotten some way of getting more money out of us by telling me that there’s an incorrect balance remaining on the card. in this case the waiter offered to go get a manager, but i’m not one to make a scene or make such a big deal about something so minor (see: increasing assertiveness). but i’ve been down that road before. the managers always come. they scan the gift card, tell me the same thing, i argue with them and show them my receipt and then they say that the gift card was used since then, blah, blah, blah. WAAAH! i want my “free money” back!


and what's up with this mess of deducting $0.95 every year the gift gift is not redeemed?! what a rip off!

well, thanks for letting me get that off my chest. i feel better now. i’m off to give blood (and hopefully score some free Krispy Kremes). happy Friday!

Thursday, September 28, 2006

penny pinching

the husband flipped when i told him i spent $100 on these earlier this week. maybe i’m nuts or maybe i just like shopping. whatever. they’re cute. even some of my students think so. they helped me pick them out after school. and besides, little J has been pulling on our fingers and begging for us to help her get up and walk around. (*sigh* she's growing up so fast!) we have to protect her precious little toesies! so big J said, “you do remember you’re just part-time this year don’t you?!” anyway, i can’t wait until they get here. should be tomorrow. so little J should be walking by Monday, right? ha, ha

well, i obviously need to cut back on my spending. or i need to come up with some other ways to make a little more money. i’m thinking that it will be easier to just try to cut back a little since you know i have all this spare time now that i have a baby and all. do you have any suggestions? it will be nice when little J stops taking so much formula. the darn stuff is SO expensive! (and of course the rice cereal and oatmeal is only like two cents a serving.) anyway, no more clothes shopping for me for a while and i’m contemplating quitting stamp club so i won’t spend any there and instead using that time as a designated scrapbooking/card making time to use the supplies i already have.

oh and by the way, we’ve now eaten one of our dream dinners and it was fabulous in my opinion. not so much in the husband’s but oh well. more to come on that…

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

something’s in the water over here

i now have three sets of friends that are currently pregnant and one who had a baby on Thursday. three out of four are boys too. (one couple doesn't know yet.) it must just be that time in my life. you know how you go through spells like my most recent if-i-have-to-go-to-another-wedding-i’ll-scream spell? well, now we’re on to the baby-making phase of life. good times. at least i get to buy lots of cute baby gifts instead of dumb china.

notes from the crib of little J

Dear Nanna and Papaw,

Thank you for taking care of me when I didn’t feel good. Thank you for still smiling at me and loving me. I really liked sitting on your laps and laying on your shoulder. You helped me feel better.

I love you!
Julianna



Dear Memmaw,

Thank you for bringing me a walker to play in. I love sliding around the kitchen in it although it's odd that it only goes backwards... I'll have to figure out how it is that Mama and Daddy can make it go forwards. But it is a lot of fun! I really like the bears on top. I hope you can come play with me sometime soon!

I love you!
Julianna




Dear Sefff,

Thanks for coming to visit me yesterday. It made me so happy to see someone besides that crazy Mama lady! I had fun swinging outside with you. Please come visit me again soon. I've heard you have a loud bike and I want to see it!

Love, Julianna

on my mind

i do not want to send my child to daycare. i do want her to have the benefits of staying with Nanna and Papaw every day. i love the fact that she gets loved on all day, individualized attention and learning experiences, a safe place with few germs, and plenty of social stimulation and adult interaction. yeah i’m also glad that she gets to go to church and interact with other kids sometimes too instead of every day at day care, but i’m happy that i know she is well taken care of by someone who loves her as much as i do.

that being said, there was an hour or so on Monday where i thought, “if only i sent her to daycare i wouldn’t have to worry about how my concern for my child affects my personal relationships with my family.” it’s unfortunate that i often hurt the feelings of the people who are close to me because i share a suggestion for taking care of the little girl. because of the way it comes out it is sometimes heard as criticism and my comments are taken personally. i wish that they didn’t and weren’t. that’s what stinks about having family take care of your baby. but i’ll take the stinky every day over putting Jules in day care and her not getting to love on her grandparents each day.

Monday, September 25, 2006

shots suck

tonight jules was not feeling well at all. she was as fussy as she could be and she didn’t even enjoy her bath which she always does. she was also spitting up a lot (the doctor says she’ll grow out of that soon). when i put her on the bed after her bath to dress her she just pooched out her bottom lip and started wimpering. it was the saddest, most pitiful little cry i’ve ever heard. real tears came rolling down her cheeks (and mine) and it was so obvious she wasn’t feeling well. she wouldn’t even roll over to play; she just looked up at me with the biggest, saddest brown eyes. she’s been running a fever from her shots this morning and we’ve been giving her tylenol, but she still is sleepy and cranky. when she was crying i just picked her up and held her and she immediately quieted down and just laid her little head down on my shoulder. it wasn’t long before her breathing matched mine and i slowly rocked her back and forth telling her that everything was ok. i love my little girl so much and it totally broke my heart tonight to see how bad she felt. i guess i got a taste of what it will be like the first time she gets sick. she is sleeping now (fell asleep on the bottle) but she’s making lots of little wimpering noises every few minutes. poor baby. and poor me. it’s hard sometimes to be a mama.

monday, monday

i worked my tail off this weekend. i did mounds upon mounds of laundry. i graded papers and washed bottles. i read article after article in educational journals for school. i learned how to encourage prosocial behaviors in tweens and how to avoid bully behavior in my classroom. i worked on my Bible study and (just this morning) got started on a book i have to read. i exercised twice (no you didn’t read wrong, i said twice). i managed to watch an educational movie that i have been putting off for what seems like months. i also got my first and second lessons completed for my online class. all of that in just one weekend. i am so proud of myself.

the little girl seems to be cutting two more teeth. the top front ones this time. she hasn’t been napping well and has been occasionally crying out in her sleep. she seems tired, but not really fussy and constantly chews on anything and everything. even the nipples on her bottles. she puts them to the side like her gums are really tender in the front. i feel so bad for her. plus, she may be on her way to dropping the 3rd nap that she takes every day.

anyway, i have a busier week than normal this week because big J is going to be out of town for work. i dread it, but i know it will be over and back to normal soon. i also have to take little J to the doctor today for her 6 month appointment and Friday i have a blood donation appointment and a school function that i have to attend at night. i guess i'll manage to get it all done. i hope you all have a great week!

6 months

Dear Julianna,

You are six months old! That’s half a year! My little baby is growing up! So much has happened in the last month, I’m not sure where to start.

You are becoming a very independent little booger. You always want to stand up! And although you cannot do it own your own yet, you are always grabbing at our fingers and pulling as if to say, “Up! Up!” You stand up and then sit down, stand, sit, stand, sit, over and over again. You don’t like to be laying down anymore at all.

In all honesty, you have really had a rough month. You cut your first teeth early this month. Two bottom ones at the same time! This has caused you to be sore and cranky and you haven’t slept very well at all because of it. We have tried giving you teething rings and cold washcloths to chew on and you gnaw away! The Tylenol helped you sleep a little better, but I wish there was more we could do for you because you haven’t been yourself. Not fussy, just really solemn and quiet. It’s okay though, because we know that we’ll get through this. Time is flying by!

Now you can hold your bottle all by yourself and you reach for it the minute you see it. You still spit up a lot though. You are drinking less and less milk these days and eating more and more “real” food. We know that you are starting to learn the signs we do too because you get excited when we say the word “milk” or “eat” and do the sign right before we feed you.

Speaking of food, you HATE green beans. You will eat anything else that we’ll let you get your hands on, but green beans….nope! You won’t have one bit of it! You’ve not only spit them out and gagged them down, but you’ve also literally blown them at us to make it clear that you will have no such food. Trust me, we got the message loud and clear, but I’m not promising that we won’t ask you to try them again in a few weeks or so.

I had a lot of fun watching you in the nursery at church for the first time this month. It was so entertaining to see you interact with the other babies. Sometimes I don’t think you had a clue that you were pulling on a toy that another kid was holding, but you didn’t seem to care when one clumsily fell on your feet. It was really hard for both your mama and your daddy to not jerk toys out of your mouth that the other babies had just been drooling on. We hope that being around those other kids at least every Sunday will be good for you.

You have really become a wiggle worm this month! You have certainly gotten the rolling thing down pat. You roll to the left and right from tummy to back and back to tummy and you love to twist and turn on the changing table. When your daddy passes you off to me after your bath I put you on the bed to put lotion on you and you immediately roll and roll. You don’t have a lot of interest in crawling yet although you will get up on your hands and knees when we help you. Most of the time you just flop back down on your tummy when you can’t reach what you want.

At your doctor’s appointment today we’ll see how much you officially weigh. I’m guessing that you’re still in the 95th percentile in weight and height. You’re such a big girl and people always comment on your chubby cheeks. Plus, you grow like a weed!

Jules, I’m so excited about the next 6 months with you! You never cease to amaze me. I love you!

Love,
Mama

Friday, September 22, 2006

whine and dine

yesterday my mom, sister and i went to Dream Dinners. it’s this place where you get together with friends or whoever and prepare gourmet meals and take them home to freeze and serve whenever you want. what’s nice is that they have all of the ingredients set out for you to put together and you get to socialize while you do it. you don’t have to study a recipe or anything because they even put the measuring spoons in the dishes for you so you don’t have to figure out how much to add or even how to half the recipe because they do that for you too. (great for those of us whose brains don’t always function correctly.)

it was a really fun experience. the food looked and SMELLED DELICIOUS and the descriptions sounded like they were straight off of a fancy restaurant menu although i don’t know how they taste yet. i’ll have to let you know about that. plus the prices are very reasonable (around $4.30 per serving). i am just thrilled to have dinner already prepped for 6 nights because dangit! it’s hard cooking dinner AND taking care of a baby. (whine, whine, whine, i know)

Thursday, September 21, 2006

how many toys do you have?

the TODAY show is doing an upcoming piece on how to get organized so that your kids’ toys are no longer taking over your house. this should be great. (read: major sarcasm) i can’t wait to see what they have to say about it. probably, “Get a Toy Box”, “Teach your child to pick up their no longer used toys before they get another one out to play with”, and “Make straightening up a game!” they’re looking for families who are willing to go on camera so that they can re-do their family room on the show.

anyway, some time ago my father heard a radio show or something where they were discussing the materialism of children these days or something like that and he told us about an idea of letting your child only have something like ten toys at a time. (i may have the details mixed up but you get the idea.) anyway, the concept was that if the child only gets to keep ten toys then they will learn to work for what they get, value what they have, and become less selfish overall by giving their extra toys to those less fortunate.

if the child were to get a gift for their birthday then they could keep that toy for a week and then decide if they wanted to replace one of their old toys with the new toy or keep the old ones and give the new toy away. eventually there would be enough toys boxed and ready for a nice outing to the Goodwill or whatever other charity and (bonus) the child would get to participate in a giving activity.

while this whole idea poses lots of questions, i think we’re ready to give it a try with Julianna. but what constitutes a toy exactly? and at what age do you start? is it ever too early to teach your children to share and give? but when is she old enough to be able to choose which she wants?

this is something i’ve struggled with my entire life. i want to have what i want to have, but i also want to be selfless and certainly not greedy. i want my daughter to grow up with plenty to play with, but not be a spoiled brat either.


thank goodness i don't have to worry about it too much for now.

because like NikkiZ all jules is really interested in are the tags.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

so much to do, but not much to write

sorry for the sucky entries this week. i haven't had much time to post lately and i haven't really wanted to anyway. it has been a crazy week so far and it was a crazy weekend. Saturday was big J's company's 100 year anniversary so they had a big celebration for all the employees and their families. they had a huge place rented and lots of stuff to do. the little girl missed a nap, but got to have her first snow cone (unflavored of course) so it was all good. and she really wasn't that sure what to do with it so it was hilarious watching her pooch out her lips and press it against the ice.

there were also lots of those inflatable jumpy things, but unfortunately that requires the ability to stand on your own and well, jump. so needless to say, little j did not get the chance to play in the inflatable jumpy things although we did explore an old castle so that was fun.

besides all that there was gem mining and some relay races and other organized company fun crap that we skipped out on, but the food was yummy and it was a beautiful day so i really had fun.

then Sunday the church that big j grew up in had it's annual homecoming. we got to take little j and show her off (and surprise, surprise miss a nap again). my favorite part was of course, getting to eat yummy food made by those awesome little old ladies.

oh yeah. sunday night we were pretty bored so we went to an elementary school playground. little j is still too young to really enjoy things like that but we all sure had fun goofing off on the monkey bars and we got some cute pictures. we'll try again in a few months.


monday nanna came over to babysit while the husband and i got to go have dinner by ourselves and last night i got to go out for ladies night for the second month in a row!

plus it is season premiere week and i've had something to watch every night. Monday was How I Met Your Mother, the most awesome comedy left on TV these days. i also wanted to catch Studio 60 because i love both Matthew Perry and Amanda Peet, but i missed it. tonight it Biggest Loser (which i am so glad they brought back - i LOVE that show!) and Project Runway. then tomorrow is the second episode of Survivor. YAY!

so it's been busy around here, but fun. i hope you'll forgive me for not writing much and just enjoy looking at my cute baby.

Monday, September 18, 2006

another self-improvement goal and stuff

continuing with the theme of assertiveness (or lack thereof) that my family keeps talking about i am going to write this post about my desire to increase my assertiveness. i don’t really want to get into specifics, but this past weekend i really demonstrated a lack of assertiveness. i always get certain ideas in my head about the way things should go and then when they don’t end up going that way i get angry. most of the time i blame that on my husband and usually if not on him then on anyone else that i can find to blame. i call myself a control freak, but really am i? can i really be labeled a control freak when i don’t take control of a situation that i obviously feel strongly enough about to get upset when it doesn’t happen my way?

anyway, i realized this weekend that it’s no one’s fault but my own. i am not assertive by nature and i am really mad at myself for getting mad at everyone else for something that is totally my fault. if i would make the choice to “make” things go my way (or at least take actions that would encourage them to) then i wouldn’t have this problem. instead, i sit on my lazy butt and sulk and complain when they don’t happen like i’d imagined.

SO.

now i have a goal for myself. [wow. i sure do seem to be the “goal-y” type lately, don’t i?] nevertheless, my goal is that i am going to try to be more assertive when i am in this particular kind of situation that i was faced with this past weekend. OR. just not sulk and complain about it.

i need you people to help me with this. you can ask me every once in a while how it is going or just gently remind me to remember my goal. sounds easy, but i can guarantee that it will be hard. i’ll let you know how it goes.

Friday, September 15, 2006

look at my cute baby


hiking on the 5th

in the recent years my family has headed to a local state park to go hiking every once in a while. for the most part i think we’ve all enjoyed it. the problem was just making it a regular event and not placing it so low on the priority list. so. several weeks ago i decided that we should go hiking every time there is a fifth Sunday that month. that way we’d at least make it four times a year and it would be scheduled (yay for schedules!) so everyone would know when it was and we couldn’t back out.

the next fifth Sunday is in October (along with everything else in the world). we are needing to get some kind of baby carrier that will let us carry little j on our backs instead of the hand-me-down one we have that holds the baby in front and facing backwards (does that make sense?). little j has grown tired of that one because she can’t see out where we’re going and also it would make it really difficult for us to see the path on the trail with her in front. please let me know if you can recommend a baby carrier that puts the baby on your back.

now if only i knew how many extra calories i will burn hiking a few hours carrying an extra 18 or 19 pounds? this should be an adventure…

oh WTH... i subscribed to my first podcast...

i spent my morning listening to my first podcast. i'm officially hooked and i took the last hour and a half learning how to download and subscribe to the RSS feed.

how fun! i love learning new things! i love british accents! but more importantly, i love harry potter!
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